View Full Version : Euro-English



lefty
12-10-2005, 12:50 PM
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.

The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.

Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.

Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensi bl rite n styl.

Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.

d’76
12-10-2005, 01:21 PM
Thats Great!!!!!!!!!!! I love it. And scary as it may seem, It all was clear as mud!!:D

Pooh and friends
12-10-2005, 05:16 PM
:eek: Wow, that is great!

J_Cyr
12-10-2005, 06:13 PM
Sadly... I understood that. :D

Hiram357
12-10-2005, 06:25 PM
i tried reading after i sobered up and i couldnt do it!! does this mean we all have to be intoxicated 24/7 to understand the goverment? and be part of the youreapeein union? :eek:

becket
12-10-2005, 06:39 PM
zat vas vay kol :)

WhereRWe?
12-10-2005, 06:45 PM
Sheesh! I hope you were able to cut-and-paste and didn't have to type that all in! LOL! ;) ;)

becket
12-10-2005, 07:16 PM
nah, i typed it in. oh! you mean lefty!

lefty
12-10-2005, 07:18 PM
Sheesh! I hope you were able to cut-and-paste and didn't have to type that all in! LOL! ;) ;)
ctrl+c ctrl+v:D

Hiram357
12-10-2005, 07:19 PM
Sheesh! I hope you were able to cut-and-paste and didn't have to type that all in! LOL! ;) ;)

well we're all gunna hafta learn how to type it soon or later :eek:

Team2hunt
12-10-2005, 08:08 PM
You left out the decryption code. :eek: